Parenting 101- HW 57

How should kids be parented?

What should be the social arrangements? An extended family, nuclear family, a village, corporate day care?
I believe an extended family is beneficial in raising a child so the child has a variety of people to rely on, whereas a nuclear family seems to be very limited and forced. To me it seems that a nuclear family is staged and unrealistic. From my own personal experience and family situations I have heard from friends, most families are not nuclear families. My family I believe is effective in raising me and my brothers and the families of my friends seem to be effective as well. How can one determine the effectiveness of a family? By how successfull they are? How can one measure the value of a person?


What should be the guiding principles? Love? Obedience? Loving obedience? Humor? Empowerment? Subordination? Time outs? Separate cribs or co-sleeping? Breast feeding or bottle? Child-centered or parent-centered? etc.

Some of the guiding principles in parenting are, loving disobedience, humor, and a balance between child centered and parent centered. The child should be able to be obedient with the parent and understand the reasons behind why they have to listen to their parents, but children should also feel comfortable around their parents. In addition, parents must know how to raise the children with a child-centered intention. And as the child grows more responsibilities, they become responsible for centering in on their parents.

What were the best parts of how you were parented (since the worst parts don't really belong in a public class blog)?

I was very close with both my parents when I was younger. Both my parents gave me the freedom to be myself but had necessary limitations and disciplinaries in learning to become a responsible person. In addition, I became close with other parent-like figures in my family, aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc. This allowed me to learn from them in addition to learning from my parents.
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How do you think you'd parent if you're put in that position?
I believe I would parent simialr to how I was parented, mainly because that is mostly what I know when it comes to parenting. In addition, I would try and imagine, as the child, what I would want a parent-like figure to do in a certain situation and fulfill that need for the child (comfort, encouragement, space, advice, etc.)

Diana Baumrind's (1966) Prototypical Descriptions of 3 Parenting Styles

This article breaks down parenting into three types of parents. Authorative, authoritarian, and permissive. The article describes the types of parenting and how the children tend to be as the grow up. The authoritive parent accepts the child still has guidelines for them, "The authoritative parent affirms the child's present qualities, but also sets standards for future conduct." The authoritarian parent tries to shape the child, "She believes in keeping the child in his place, , in restricting his autonomy, and in assigning household responsibilities in order to inculcate respect for work." Finally, the permissive parent gives minimal orders and allows the child to make decisions for themself. "She allows the child to regulate his own activities as much as possible, avoids the exercise of control, and does not encourage him to obey externally defined standards."

The affects these types of parents have of the children are different for each type of parent. For the authoritive parent, the child tends to be more confident and goes against the grain (does not conform to of gender roles), and they tend to be more social. I believe this is true because, the parent allows freedom for who the child is, but still has regulations that make the feel comfortable. The authoritairan parent raises a child that is successfull in school work but has an unhappy disposition contrasting with the child raised by the authorative parent. I think this makes sense because they are raised to listen to the authorative figure and remains insecure when they need to think for themself. Permissive parents, raise rebellious children and antisocial behavior I believe because the parents have so little regulations, it makes the child feel as if they do not care, leading them to being antisocial and rebelling. Based on how I see myself and how I was raised, I think my parents are a balance between authorative and permissive.